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Posts tagged ‘mean’

It’s time to speak out about this!  It’s not often talked about because it’s so subtle you almost feel childish for mentioning it and that’s exactly how these bullies get over.  They assume you won’t speak out about it because it’s not a mainstream form of bullying!  Well it’s time we put a name on it so we can start calling people out!  Naming the behavior helps it to stop because people hate to be labeled negatively.

“Mind/Energy Bullying”!  It’s when someone feels insecure around you for whatever reason: perhaps you’re prettier, smarter, taller, thinner, higher ranking in your field, more popular, more talented, more confident, favored, wealthier, etc.  So they constantly try to level the playing field by making you feel insecure or crazy because they can’t handle the competition (even though this competition is all in their minds because you’re just being you).  And they do it in very subtle ways:

1) When you receive a compliment praise do they:  roll their eyes, scowl, make a negative/contradictory comment under their breath, try to redirect the focus onto themselves?

2) If you tell them you like someone do they:  talk about an experience they had with that person (that would potentially make you jealous) over and over , try to get close to that person, or say nasty things about that person when they never did before?

3) If you’ve had your eye on a handbag do they: show up with the bag the very next day even though you know it’s not their style; or do they make a snide, negative comment about the bag once you finally get it?

4) Does he/she try to get close to the people who try to get close to you.  Thereby making it seem as if you have to go through her/him to get to them or they have to go through her/him to get to you?

5) Do they always want to know what you’re doing and then suddenly they’re doing it too or trying to do it one step better, bigger, bolder than you?

6) Do they copy your style of dress/hairstyle/phrases you say/your mannerisms and present it to people/accept compliments as if it were their own?

7) Do they ask you what you’re wearing and show up wearing the same costume but jazzier?

8) Do they try to monopolize your time either on the phone, text or in person? (it’s not because they love you.. this tactic they’re using is called “Keeping your enemies closer”)

9)  Do you catch them looking at you, then looking at themselves, looking at you, then looking at themselves..COMPARING

**10)** When you try to bring it to their attention do they feign ignorance and try to make you feel childish for even suggesting they’re doing anything to you?

These are all telltale signs that you are being Mind/Energy Bullied.  And you don’t have to put up with it.  Call your local Hater Control and have them locked up (if only there was one, right??)!!

But honestly we sometimes think, “Maybe this is a test and I’m just supposed to rise above it”.  NOT EVERYTHING IS A FRIGGIN TEST!!  The only thing you’re supposed to learn from these people is how NOT to be.  Don’t waste your time trying to remain friends with a Mind/Energy Bully.  Because eventually they’ll succeed in leveling the playing field and you’ll end up sinking into the same pit of despair they’re in.  Cut them loose and continue being FABULOUS!!

*Some other names for this or the people that do this:  ”Reverse Psychology Crazy”, “Straight-Jacket, slew-foot crazy”, “Bitch-ass Loser”*

Cut ya losses boo-boo.. I’ve won!!  BOO-YAAAAA!!!!!

Feel free to use this terminology when you’re going off right before cutting them off!  Tell them I said so!

They Say…

Sierra writes:

Dear Deviled Angel,

I have a co-worker that incessantly criticizes me about everything from my clothes to how I do my work.  But she’s super slick about it.  She always tries to make it seem like someone else is saying it and she’s just delivering the message.  For example she’ll say, “You know they say you shouldn’t wear such short skirts to work because it tempts the male co-workers” or “They’re saying you should probably not have those figurines on your desk because they’re a bit juvenile”.  The thing is this imaginary “they” she keeps referring to… I KNOW IT’S HER!!  She’s the one who has a problem with me!  She’s not my supervisor or my superior in any way.  She’s just a jealous old lady with cankles and a triple-chin who hates me because I’m young and vibrant.  I want her off my back!  Give me something good!

DEVIL’S RESPONSE:

cankles [cayn-kuhls] – fat legs in which the calf seamlessly flows right into the ankle with no significant definition between the two parts of the leg; making the leg look stump-ish.  usually seen in extremely obese people.

The next time this ridiculous woman comes over to criticize, cut her off right after she says the words “they say” and say to her, “Well you know what else they say?  They say that sending a fat, canklic, triple-chin having geriatric cow to deliver mean messages gets the messenger slapped in her frickin’ face!  So the next time they say something to you I suggest you keep it to yourself!!”

Angel’s Response:

Nice.